“I was one of five in our family who was very very fortunate to have had the opportunity to move to America”

Story #8

Ryan Mai, first-generation Vietnamese-American

Interviewed & Written by Iris Fitzsimmons Christensen

Edited by Madeline Humphery

Ryan Mai was born into a large family in Saigon, Vietnam. He was one of ten children living in a small, three-bedroom home. When Mai was just nine years old, the Vietnam War ended and the United States began a program called, “Operation New Life.” It evacuated 130,000 South Vietnamese men, women, and children to start a new life in the United States. Mai’s family qualified for evacuation and his parents were faced with the decision to send five of their ten children to the United States with the hope that they could begin a “New Life.”

“I was one of five in our family who was very very fortunate to have had the opportunity to move to America and it really literally changed my life.” 

Waiting on the tarmac, Mai says that he can remember seeing the cargo plane fly in for him and the other evacuees. “This was a turning point for me.” That cargo plane represented hope and the opportunity that awaited them in the United States to Mai.

After some time in America at a military base, Mai and his siblings were taken in by a family with five children of their own. For Mai, this was a key factor of his success in his new country, as he was surrounded by support, acceptance, and love. 

“[Our] lives would have been very different if we had not been accepted and sponsored by such a caring and loving family,” Mai says. 

After six months, Mai’s oldest sister found a job as a secretary and was able to get a small, two-bedroom loft for her and her siblings. Mai began the third grade at a catholic school, and he tried his best to assimilate into American culture, even though he admits that he did not really understand what that culture was at the time. 

Despite this, he felt accepted in his new country. In school, Ms. Thomas, the English as a Second Language teacher, was able to help him build a strong foundation in English. He credits learning English, as difficult as it was, as being a big part of his ability to assimilate into American culture. Ms. Thomas was always patient and caring, such as giving him candy for just pronouncing her name correctly. 

“It's little things like that,” Mai says as he reflected on his journey to getting assimilated in America and emphasizing the, “culmination of little things that people had done– that expression of love and kindness towards us, towards me, towards my family, that really helped me to formulate my values in life.”

Mai excelled in science and mathematics along with his successful athletic career, all of which earned him admission into Washington State University, where he completed his bachelor’s degree in mechanical engineering. However, he realized upon graduating that he did not want to pursue a career in his field, so he took a job with an elevator company, and for 15 years he built his career there. 

When he was at the top of the company, in charge of thousands of employees spanning across Asia, Mai realized that he was not happy. He was traveling three weeks out of every month, the days seemed to blur together and he realized that the constant moving was putting stress on his family. This was the second turning point for Mai, and after discussing with his family, he decided to attend a program for executives at Harvard University, where he learned how to change his leadership style and life balance. 

He described the program, like a Venn diagram with three rings: one is your education, knowledge, experience, and set of skills. Another is wealth, power, prestige, title, and external rewards. The third is authenticity, passion, and purpose. Where they overlap in the center is the “sweet spot,” as Mai calls it. After completing his training, he switched careers and is now genuinely happy at his new job where he is fulfilled and spends his spare time giving back as a mentor. Mai has truly found the sweet spot. 

When interviewing Mai for this article, I was touched not only by his sincerity, but also by his authenticity and generosity. Mai and his story inspire not only optimism, but also self-growth and focusing on the pursuit of happiness above all else.